Be a pineapple: Stand up straight, wear a crown, and always be sweet on the inside.

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I always prefer my puns to be intended. Life is too short to wear boring undies. Being a fruit loop in a bowl of cheerios. We’re all just molecules.

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A caffeine-dependent life-form.

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I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.

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Here to serve… The cat overlord.

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I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

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Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.

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I woke up and… posted this.

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Life is short… smile while you still have teeth.

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I’m starting to like Instagram, which is weird because I hate pictures.

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The hardest thing I ever tried is being normal.

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Words cannot express my love and passion for Fridays. The photos might help.

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A preview of my life. This is not the whole movie. P.S.: if you wanna get behind the scenes just head to my stories.

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Recovering from donuts addiction.

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Chocolate never asks me any questions, chocolate understands me.

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“Be strong,” I whisper to my WiFi signal.